Thursday, August 12, 2010

Achan...(daddy)

It was late yesterday night that I had seen some rather heart breaking advertisement about a father and his importance to the family.

I wondered the whole night before I slept whether any person could have been a better dad than mine? I suppose everyone has a great dad... but whenever I think of him, he was the perfect dad. We call dad in my native language as "Achan".

I had referred to his queer ways and his funny side in earlier one of my blogs, but then I never mentioned his loving side!

It all starts to the day I can remember in my earliest of my childhood, when I was around 4 years old, I had this nice little fall, and broke my head near my eyebrow.
I don't remember how I reached or when I reached the hospital, I just remember that during the whole time the doctor was sewing up my head, and I could see the needle go up and down around my forehead, with a needle the size of a cobbler, my dad was there, not shedding a tear, but always smiling at me and waving a nice big packet of GEMS candy! And I remember being carried back home with my head on his shoulder.. eating them as if nothing had happened on my forehead.

Wondering how the years passed, and I remember faintly anything but only the best moments with him... I should have been 6 or 7 years and able to read that I remember my trips with him on his old lambretta scooter to the rice mill and the ration shop near by. I used to love the smells of the spices and ground flour at the mill, and used to love a nice steady flow of sneezing because of the dust.

Buying our ration I used to come back home on his bike, and the main attraction of the trip was the stopover at Ravi's Stationary and grocery shop. I still remember Ravi, the shopkeeper. He had really curly hair and lots of it and with two big side burns, and he was fairly dark with an extremely big moustache, he was tall and very heavily built too, the kind of guy you would expect in a local police force rather than in a shop, he was nice to me, always used to welcome me with a pat on shoulder or a ruffling of my hair.

Every trip, I used to get a dairy milk chocolate or some toffees. One day I saw something amusing on the wall, it was a snake and ladder hung on the wall! A snake and ladder board. I should say I as a kid was also never demanding, I used to never utter what I wanted and just used to stare and fiddle with my object of passion, so there I was having my chocolate and looking at it and my all knowing father asked "Do you want it?" and I just smiled, no more questions asked, money paid and the next day till another month I was playing snake and ladders. I remember I played so much that I could see only ladders and snakes in my dreams too! That was my father who used to do things without me asking, understanding what I wanted.

All the while I was growing up I remember our times, when he used to ask me for a kiss which used to reach kozhikkode from Malappuram or from Cochin to Kozhikkode. That was the length of the kiss he wanted, and I would start kissing him on his rough coarse shaven cheek and he used to say, it just reached here now(some places in between our destination and origin)... go on! He used to be in eternal bliss having my kid lips on his cheek, and I can still see him smiling!

Then there were times when I was asked to walk on his back to relieve his backpain..he used to make me walk on his back, it was a wierd feeling, I was so worried that I will hurt him, I was hardly 7 or 8 then, and he was a strong man, around 6 foot in height and weighing over 90 kgs, so I was a like a feather to him. I was never too old enough then to work out the dynamics of weight then!

When I grew older I remember how I used to loose my pens in school, and all kids there used to protect thier pens like it was "the Lost Arc", because thier parents would strip them off thier skin! I was absent minded, and was not careless, so my father used to bring every week around 10 pens till the time I used to have one pen each for a day. One day I felt I was being extremely careless and started taking care of my pens, that day was when half of the class was using the same brand of pens which my dad used to buy for me! That was the day I realised if I am not careful, then the whole world can take advantage of me, even if I have unlimited supplies! He never scolded me on this or anything, but I realised on my own, without a single harsh word!


In 27 years I have known him, the only time he had beaten me was once! And that too for something which I seriously believe a beating was not enough.. I should have been subjected to lashing! So I wonder, how can someone have not a single difference of opinion with someone else? Like me and my dad, and even if I knew he had an opinion, and I didn't like it, it was never a difference of opinion, it was my achan's words.

In all the times we were together I only remember him being upset over my decision to get married to the girl I loved, and till date when I think of him, I have no regret, no anger, no anguish, just the thought that I hurted him, when I shouldn't have. I think love is like that... You just can't have a reason or rhyme, or just can't keep a grudge or remember a bad memory. Might be that is why I have no bad memories about my achan!


He was the one man whom I respected more than any man I have ever or will meet, and one man who gave me the most wonderful childhood. Whenever I remember him now, I cry till I can breath no more, that is when I think my dad shouldn't have been so nice, that because you don't just want to think about him, as you fear how much you will miss him!

Beside my dad's funeral pyre my brother whispered to me, "I was just praying to god that I can be one by thousand of how good a dad my dad was I would be thankful..." I didn't have any answer to that, but now when I think about it I believe, I could be never as loving, caring, understanding and supporting! It is the near impossible thing to achieve and this man with no dad to love him or noone to show him how to be his kids, as he was orphaned by the time he was hardly 9 years, showed us how a great father can be!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Navel?

I should say by now some of my readers have dismissed me as a hopeless pervert!
So is the case with many of my friends who say that I should be "dismissed" as a pervert, as I am a "practicing" pervert!

I love my oxymoronic statements! And as I can expect as like many of us, I am also not a practising english literature student, I just don't know the real meaning or how these things like "paradox", "oxymoron", and some other wierd contraptions like "paradigm" etc are to be used or what it means!

Coming to my topic, as any man would agree the significance of this scar is the only reason many of our Indian film actress survive, I am referring to the human navel or normally referred to the belly button!

Now a button is something which projects outside, but to call something which heals back into pit just after few weeks of birth after resembling a button is really wierd. I consider this as perversion, but people rather not refer it as navel but as a belly button.

All said and done, I think god had something in his mind when he said this part of the body will not heal after we are born... And many argue it is fairly because there is not much of tissue to heal beneath the navel... that is the most preposterous claim I have ever heard.

Human body like the song by john mayer is a wonderland! A baby is born with a skull which are in pieces and all of the fuse together to form a perfect skull, so that our human brain which is bigger than most animals is allowed out though the small valley of the hip bones, which has not adapted to this large sized brain.
The scortum of a baby develops near the abdomen and moves into position just before birth.

All this considered, don't you think a small connection of the umbilical chord which falls off after a few days of its removal will not heal? Is it such a great achievement for a body which changes in many ways after birth?

What was god's intentions? Was it that it should be a attractive area for the men? I think not. Men would love women whichever form they were, as we are programmed to!

Did god feel that one day human beings would find a way to reuse the umbilical chord during thier journeys to the far fetched galaxies by being in sleep and left this as an opening for us to reuse, like a plug point ready to derive the require resource when it is plugged in? Some say that the vein behind the umbilical chord changes into a fibrous mass and the connection is broken behind our skin, but did god believe we can revive it?

There is lot of research on stem cells etc, based on the umbilical chord cells or the placenta, does this mean these research would one day lead us to derive all cure and nutrition like once we did in our wombs through our navel?

I would rather not believe god left it simply without any reason, because I believe he/she is more intelligent than anyone of us can ever imagine!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

performance anxiety

Men normally are preys to performance anxiety!

Some things in life have no meaning, like this particular anxiety... it makes you so anxious that you just cannot perform at even the normal standard that you were supposed to perform. Some say the resultant adrenaline helps in rescuing us from the situation, but the only way I can see that happening is running away from the situation at speeds unimaginable normally.

Now before you guys get wrong impression about the performance anxieties I have to get to the topic.

I was invited recently to a bhoomi puja (ground breaking)of one of the projects wherein I was a vendor. Now that the custom goes after the pundits (not the english pun for knowledgable people, but hindu uppercaste brahmin community, who are in knowledge of the veda's (hindu religious scriptures)), were chanting the mantras (again not the english meaning, but scriptures)! Oh the perils of borrowing from sanskrit by englishmen!

Anyways when they started their offerings to god, one of the main ritual is every stake holder is supposed to break a coconut as an offering to the gods! The idea here about the ritual is that everyone's coconut is an omen to the way their responsibility towards the project is going to be shaping up.

The coconut has to be broken on a large granite stone laid for the purpose by simply hammering the coconut on to it with your bare hands! Not a big task though, any small kid can do it! There is a catch though! The coconut has to break in perfect middle or in two equal or near to equal pieces when you break! It should not shatter, nor it should be unequal, that is bad omen! Also one more issue... Your coconut should be fresh and good, should not have gone bad!

One by one everyone are going coconuts, rather doing their coconuts. And I am really sweating. There is a horde of people including my client, the managing director and other directors of that company etc anxiously watching!I am not at all superstitious, but I can't vouch that for them, so I am getting all hyper-ventilated.

Now is my turn... I feel like an athlete in olympics down to do his final performance... All turns silent! I take the coconut in my hand, shake it near my ear to judge whether it has water (rendering it as a quality one as in fresh), to be very frank, I have no idea of judging if a coconut goes bad whether it will make no sound or not, but I had seen many athletes in their performances ensuring that it was a standard practice (something similar to rubbing a stitch ball on your crotch when you play cricket, frankly till I was too old to have stopped playing cricket as a looser, I never knew why they rubbed it! Seen in TV so had to imitate the big players).

So there I was hearing to the jingling sound of water from the coconut... looking at the stone... wondering whether it will break into perfect halves, whether the good old coconut would still be good, or gone rotten inside! I was at the peak of performance anxiety! Wondering if only I could run away from there!

And then I took the bold step... like the long jumpers.. I didn't have three attempts.. I was bestowed with only this one coconut! And I had to break it now come whatever may. The adrenaline was making me faint... people silent, I felt like in the middle of a world cup football stadium where people were silent for the final penalty shootout... so I gain all my courage and shoot!

Wonderful... all clapping hands, all elated cheers... My coconut was perfect two halves... and it was perfectly fresh! No rotting for miles! I felt like I was in the podium of olympics recieving my gold medal!

No wonder men are averse to performance anxieties... If only there was no athelete in everyone of us! The human race would have been extinct by now! I think in this case the testosterone helps! Never for a coconut it helps! I am not that weird!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Love is Shit!

love is like shit.. u can't keep it within u for long, it stinks in private, and if public it can have an infectious effect and still stinks! Copyright Edmonddante 2008

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Being a tourist!

It has been 3 days since my return from the UK, I am wondering what influenced me the most about my visit there? It was definitely a leisure trip! It was my first vacation in
years. I think the last time I had taken a vacation was when I had visited Mysore with my father mother and my brother as a 11 year old kid. Yeah I can also remember later when
I was 13, my visit to delhi with my cousin and the outings with my uncle aunt my cousin brother and cousin sister. Nothing has been better than that mysore trip afterwards in my
life!

I remember the roads of mysore, the roaming around the chariots in the mysore palace, the long and tiring visit to the brindavan gardens where I puked all what I ate on a
beautiful north indian lady, who was kind enough to bear it looking at me the tired kid, getting drenched washing my clothes with them fully on of the vomit (not pleasant, but
was a real experience), and walking like a zombie after all this in the beautiful brindavan gardens holding my mother's hands. The visit to the museum in mysore and the sneak
touch on the throne there... made me feel like a king, when I touched something where it was written do not touch!

The long haul walk to chamundi hills later, and the view of mysore from atop the hill...
Later the cancelled trip to Tipu's fort, due to some health problem of my dad, of which my brother had boasted so much about, and also the tall stories my brother gave about the
Tipu's sword which was so big noone could even lift it, which I never saw and coz of the trip being cancelled!

And who could ever forget the stay in dasprakash hotel, and also the finest vanilla icecream cone I ever had from that hotel... every trip was to end with that! I also faintly
remember that the best tea I had ever had in my life was from mysore... milky and milky was the key word there, but tasted best..

And who could forget my dad's "eege and oogee", which he said was "here and there" in kannada, the local language of karnataka where mysore is located. He used to direct all
autorickshaw drivers saying "eege eege and ooge ooge"

I later stayed in bangalore, the capital of karnataka for work for 2.5 years, and my dad visited us many times during this time, and myself and my brother both now fully grown
up and working, quizzed our dad, that till now we have never heard "eege or oogee" other than "illi and alli", which actually meant "here and there" in kannada, and he used to
escape saying was a local dialect of mysore... I am still unsure about that fact! My memories about my dad are so sweet and so boyish of him... he never grew up, he was the
biggest kid of our family!

Now getting back to london... what did I like about this city so much that it reminded me of the best memories I have had of a vacation in any place? I am sure I know the answer
to this...best of all I had my family back along with me for a vacation, me my brother my mother, my brother's kid and his wife, except my dad who was nomore with us to find the
local dialect of english spoken in london, and direct the tube driver (I am sure he would have done that too...) about the being punctual to the dot(not even the london tube can
be punctual to the extend my dad wanted it to be)!!

As soon as I reached london, the first thing I noticed was the place was filled with history, it had cruel and a tiring past, and its people pardoned thier forefather's atrocities with forgiving smiles to anyone who is around. I walked on the tower bridge only to find that poetry was composed for long on that bridge and many great poets found inspiration on it to give a heart of appreciation to the beautiful city which was called london! London is surely the bard's empire...

I was always surprised by the talent of the man called shakespear who was such a genius, but if you are in london inspiration is no more needed to be invented... The tube or the london underground, is filled with poems in each compartment, which I am sure very few londoners should have noticed called "Poems on the underground", I should have read around 30 poems in a span of 3 days...

I am sure I have never done anything like that in my entire life, except when I had an english exam in school and forced to do it! This round of reading in london, I thoroughly enjoyed, as it was leisurely and because I wanted to, first time in my life!

I was filled with a joy of knowing that people in that land was able to love with the same devotion, like once they had suggested thier imperialistic empire over the whole world! Thier love was flowing in those poems, in those many hundred old aged couples I had seen walking around holding each others hands... with thier eyes always upon each other! Alas I wish I was born there, where love was flowing forever!

The tower of london, where Issac newton the greatest man was just a mint master, the ravens (crows) who were considered protectors of the castle and still like a good football team a minimum number of six players with their substitutes are still kept! The jewels and monarchy of a nation displayed with splendour, not asking to look back at good times of memories, but better times which are ahead of them!

London is one place where thier king queen and all are not symbols of a prosperous past gone by, but a proud reminder of the current wealth and where it came by from, how much so ever in quantity or hegemony it has reduced till date!

A treasure island flowing with poems and art, with musicians on the subway playing thier instruments and singing better than the American idol contestants... The land is a place
of great talent, and as an art lover you can always stop from your hectic life and take a second to appreciate it...

I am sure very few londoners have read the poems or heard to a full song by an artist singing on the tube station... I could because I was a tourist! Hope my life will always be that of a tourist... just seeing the sights and walking along, never to rest, never to pain, never to stop loving anyone because they are not your race, religion or clan... and read on the poems of love!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

For my love!

The sceptre is nothing without a crown,
my life nothing without you to own!

The wonders of the world do not amuse,
until you are not there to see and muse!

my tongue holds no charm from world cucines,
if you are not around to cook my meals!

The world in its beauty does not look pleasant,
unless you are mine forever and present!

The nectars of the flowers will never stand a test,
before the few drops from your hands to quench my thirst!

I can overcome my uttermost fears,
if I see it costs you a single drop of tears!

Monday, July 28, 2008

Thought For the Day!

"Truth gets you shit!...But atleast it won't leave you constipated!' Copyright Edmonddante 2008

Monday, July 23, 2007

Divine Being-Male or Female?

This is not the first time I am writing something which one of my readers have asked me to ponder about...

When there is a scarcity of good thoughts the only way you can replenish the supply is by borrowing a thought or so for sowing the seeds in your brains farmland!

The question in question today is the eternal question in debate as to whether our most revered divine being's sex, and not sexuality... now that had caused much more debates in an established curriculum of religious edicts, which proposed god as man or woman... for instance say Hinduism, which accepted same sex marriages in a very polite way as Shiva and Vishnu bearing an offspring called Ayyappan whose birth was a result of the seductive beauty of Mohini, one of the forms which Vishnu used to take, in once instance to get Elixir of life from the Asura's (Demon clan) and on another to kill the asura called Bhasmasura through a tricky enchanting dance! All said and done, vishnu was a male god, who bore a male god's son.

Also in Hinduism god's were also in the form of half man-half woman too, like the Ardha Narishwara (Meaning Half male and female eshwar=divine being), and in a way helping the enunch's get some respect in a society where they were battered often.

So much of my writing till now holds for the hindu aspect, as being a hindu devotee, and someone who have learned hinduism from my grandmother, I think I am only in a position to talk a lot about something which I have some amount of knowledge, although I don't claim it to be perfectly right either.

As to christianity, God in his divine form was always male, even when it came to the holy trinity, the father the son and the holy spirit, same case in hinduism also the trinity here too is all male... Bhrama Vishnu and Maheshwara (Shiva). Islam although doesn't present god in such a context, but the gender for all purposes when framing sentences in the same is also mostly male.

So what do I think? Now that is the question someone asked me... When I think about it, god needs to hold no gender, gender is his instrument for us to copulate and head on with our lives as a diverese genetic pool!

Why should god have a gender? He/she is not looking at a having sexual pleasures, God is a divine being who is above all the materialist values of sex, life, happiness and distress. We paint him/her in our colors of human urges as we want to identify ourselves with god, again a small materialistic pleasure by us selfish humans. I am not refuting the fact that even hermaphrodites (beings who have both sexual organs have their way of enjoying the act of copulation (like snails).

Here the idea goes a bit further, I feel god will not have any sexual organs to term himself/herself male or female.. he/she will be pure energy, can we classify pure energy as male or female? When you are not interested in sexual pleasures, you have no reason to introduce new divine beings into this world, why do you need a sex?

In all I feel god is only pure energy which maintains an equilibrium of things, we might want to cry and pray to him/her for our feelings, and expect him/her to alter the world for us, but then when we ourselves talk of the greater good as intelligent beings, I suppose being the most intelligent being, god would only take those steps considering the greatest good... an equilibrium of all things present to be maintained as per the plans god holds for all things living, dead and non living objects!

I have used him/her to refer to god, the more appropriate word should have been "it", but as the english language refers to something which does not hold life... How can I use it from someone who is the orgin and ending of all things living?

Friday, July 13, 2007

Pleasure the ultimate convincer!

Starting to wonder, what motivates this world? The only answer that comes to mind is that it is the carnal desire, to achieve pleasure.

How much so ever a saint you try to be you cannot but think that in your insticts it is coded down to the minutest of your components.

When do I think like this? To be precise it is not the greatest of the moments that lead me to think, its the toilet to be precise! Why is it pleasurable to be doing my waste dumping? Might be because if it didn't give us a slight amount of pleasure, we guys might have never wanted to keep our system in order.

Yes, I know it might be gross for some section of my readers, but then in the end of the day, when you think about it, this is what you have to do regularly to keep your body healthy! Or else your body will be filled with toxins, leading your liver and kidney to fail, and then later on your heart and ultimately to untimely death.

How much so ever any mother would want to say it is her love for her child which keeps her to breast feed her kids, everyone knows that the same also can be associated with a slight amount of pleasure. Although there are the really terrible baby bites after he/she has grown some teeth!

I am sure we guys would have never been so prominent as a race, if we too had heat periods like bitches? I am sure we would have had a litter in every heat period, but not the kind of population explosion as of now, as if all the kids happen to be born within the same month, I am sure if a beubonic plague or any other kind of distressing contagious disease comes through the whole human new generation, who are of the same age, as they are born around the same month, would have been easily wiped off! Not simply the plants in rainforests have ways to disperse thier seeds wide and far, either as excretements of animals, or thier own transport devices (like coconuts, which can float on water), or like some seeds like cotton which can fly with the wind.

Instead of space dispersement of our seeds ( I mean offsprings in our case), one of the biggest achievements in evolution as a race we could have, was that our sexually active periods are throughout the year, hence a constant chance of different people concieving at different periods, so we can easily and boastfully say we are the first species to have crossed the time barrier for spreading our clan. We can have offsprings at anytime of the year, unlike all animals or plants who have restricted time barriers.

Anyways the whole point being, as pleasurable as sex is... that I think is the only reason we guys reproduce for the first instance. Yes, true being an advanced species we have parental and other needs to be fulfilled, but that too rests on the personal pleasure of seeing your kid grow up.

So all is about pleasure guys! So pleasure it up! I have not in anyways ribbed, dotted or perfumed my subject for your pleasure... as I think the whole topic is all about pleasure.

Monday, May 07, 2007

Monday, April 23, 2007

Spirituality

People do a lot of things to achieve what they consider as spirituality! One can say someone has achieved this great feat when someone has reached a stage in life where abstinence is the supreme word... Abstinence from all worldly pleasures!
The word abstinence in itself gives the wrong connotation... As in you abstain from doing something means you can actually do it, but you really are controlling yourself from doing it!
Take in case of sex, the greatest sages of the world have followed abstinence from sex, or you can call it celibacy. Why do you call someone celibate? As he has always in his mind an urge to have sex, which is the primal need or instinct in him, and he is able to control it.
Shouldn't be spirituality a bit more persuasive? I mean shouldn't it be the state when there is no feelings for worldly pleasures at all? Might be there is chance that this state is throughly unachievable?
People who achieve this state are normally the mentally ill, who have no thoughts or meanings for these pleasures. Their case can be also suspect in some cases, wherein they are termed by society as mentally ill, when thier acts are normally not acceptable to society and there is no way to justify thier actions. Something like the Virginia Tech killings last day. (my utmost deep felt condolences to all who were victims of this senseless act). We stereotype and try to find out some way to justify their actions, but then there is no way that there can be a continuous pattern in all this too, as human behaviour has no pattern. So this leaves the mentally ill also away from the group who can ever achieve the Spirtiuality platform.
I think this leaves only two groups, who can be termed actually the most spiritual. They are the actual sons and daughters of god, unfazed, by all what is happening around them, not disturbed by any such worldly pleasures... I would say they are infants, thier instincts are so pure, so much only for survival, and thier love for all is fearless... The other group are the mentally challenged. They too are spiritually on a higher platform... they abstain from anything which can be termed as bad, and they can never be possesed by the satan. They are pure...
So I feel all spirituality leads us to god, butI think the true spirituality everywhere can be achieved by fearless love... Like infants, like the mentally challenged! I feel to attain spirituality we should never think of abstinence as a path... As if we are prone to some worldly pleasures, that is right, as god intended us to enjoy to the best possible in our lives. So the only true path to spirituality is fearless love... Love everyone to your best possible... Even your enemies, strangers, anyone... If all will follow this way to spirituality, I am sure the "world peace" that the otherwise bitching beauty pagent winners wish for will be so easy to achieve.

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Do we know what to eat?

The topic might look like an attempt by me, to try to cash into the multi billion-dollar diet and healthcare industry. Now when my thoughts wander, they wander real far... Now that when I come to think, I mean it in a real basic sense, not about how many calories, what calorific value each component which in essence means, Carbohydrates, fats, amino acids and stuff present to you! Its even not about whether your food has enough fibers (as good as eating a carpet?) or whether your coffee is decaffeinated (now that brings me to the question, if all the caffeine is already removed, then why the hell you call it coffee?)

My thought, which I am right now pondering on, is, where did human beings know what to eat and what not to eat?

Its so easy today, you go into a hotel, you order for a chicken sandwich, or a Big Mac.... You know what all goes into it... Or you walk into your nearest Chinese restaurant, order some snakes (Sorry wrong example), chicken sandwich... In essence who decided that only Chinese will eat snakes, no one else will even try em?

If you actually think of it the prawns that we eat as a delicacy comes from the same phylum (that is a differentiation used in taxonomy) as spiders!, they all are arthropoda or rather phylum arthropoda, which in essence means they all have common characteristics.

Phylum Arthropoda consists of animals with exoskeleton (hardened exterior) that have segmented bodies and jointed appendages. The segments are fused to form body parts. The first part is the head, followed by thorax and the hind part is abdomen. There are appendages on these segments, which are specialized to perform specific functions such as walking, jumping, eating and lots of other activities. They have in them something else called classes..., which are even greater subdivision, wherein the class we eat are called the crustaceans (now the big question... did we classify only those guys who we eat as crustaceans?) why not the arachnids? They are the spideys of the world... So did we classify them so as we don't eat em? Or else visibly all are having same external identical classification.

Now I have gone too much into science and my old plus two biology lessons!

The question still remains... who decided what we do eat and what we don't? We could have learned a lot from observation, as in seeing what the animals eat and what they don't... but then the bigger confusing question, how did animals get to know that some fruits are poisonous? Even though they are nice in smell and taste? Many argue that the same is because they see other animals die after eating that particular fruit that they stop it... but as far as the diet and social organization of any animal goes, it is very difficult to say that it wouldn't have had at least 20 varieties of fruits before it has returned back to its resting place... But there is also a valid reason here, as it is seen they are keen observers... If you actually put em in a new habitat, I am sure the deaths in the initial few generations will be high due to new fruits and vegetables which they have never seen!

As to us human beings, now we don't even know where all the knowledge of what all we can eat has come from, as it is passed on from generation to generation, when a kid eats his first meal from his mother he knows what is good for him, or what he can eat! That is also the reason, what we eat is so culture specific... Chinese and snakes, Indian no cows, and Americans... Well that is something to debate... I don't think they have anything that they don't eat! (More so... as they are a mixed culture, and do not have a rich heritage of cuisine)

Some of the Indian dishes and Chinese dishes are at least 5000 years old... so it is not very easy to know who found it out first!

So... Still the wandering thought remains... why don't I eat flavored paper? It is easy to chew... has lot of fibers and cellulose (now that is one thing only monkeys can digest, we have long given up on cellulose... our appendix is vestigial organ rather in common English "useless Organ"). So why not? Might be that is why it became vestigial or is it because It is vestigial organ that I don't eat paper? Cows regularly are seen to do so... don't know whether they like the taste or not!
So I wander along.... just one thought to share with all you guys, next time when you have some tasty item of food in your hand, and you are just going to gulp it down... just think for a second... who would have first decided that it was something good to eat... or who would have collectively and after long trials declared that it was good?

Monday, July 17, 2006

Men - the perfect creation

Chauvanism... this is one sure comment I expect for this blog of mine! Being a man of queer observations, as would Mr. Watson mention about Mr. Holmes, I also want to present like Mr. Holmes some of my singular experiences in the observation of the homo sapiens sapiens (As Mr. Holmes would again say... " Elementary Mr. Watson, you should know better than me that the 21st centuary man is called Sapiens sapiens, as they are intelligent twice as much as their better known ancestors!). So as I can hear you readers asking me in the same old fashioned victorian polite english "pray continue...."

So the matter taken to discussion today remains Men the perfect creation! As far as the whole mammal, bird, or insect community is concerned, the male sex of the species always are the better looking ones or the better gifted ones!

This has a pure need based functionality, as they are the ones who need to seduce the female order into their charms, as females are known for the pick and choose, except for female fruit flies, who I have read believe in multiple sex partners, and then their eggs are fertilised by a competition unmatched by even the olympics. The multiple males have sex with her at the same time, and insert their sperms, and then the sperms of each and every male sex partner fights with themselves, and also with that of the other macho boys around... that is what I call truly survival of the fittest, this I believe was an experiment to show that women are in more need of polygamy than men, as it is in thier instinct to get the best sperm, and not like men who are forced to do it as nature and women dictates it!

Anyways we are deviating like Mr. Holmes from the topic, the male sex is more endowed I was saying, yes it is a very easy observation to make, the lion has facial hair that makes it look majestic, the peacock has its beautiful feathers and also dancing skills in males, the cockoo's singing ability is only with the male order, the rooster has got the flowers on its face and colorful tail feathers to make it look beautiful... So the fact remains, that nature in all its form want the men to look beautiful or handsome! So that their tricks can seduce female of the species!

The same holds good for Human beings too... Ancient romans & greeks knew the beauty of the male form, their innumerable sculptures adoring the male muscles! They say as handsome as a greek god, not a goddess! The fact remains that men are naturally born handsome! How many men, leave alone the gays (they have to attract an equally handsome partner as them), do makeup before leaving for office or club? As far as I know the number of men using talcum powder has also come down due to good quality deodrants (earlier men used talcum powder as a deodrant).

Men never do any kind (By this I take the liberty of sterotyping by means of large numbers of people whom I am acquainted with) of makeup. No lipstick, no mascara, no powder, nobase, no foundation, no brick masonry on thier face! For women thier face is literally a construction site! They start with base make up, the foundation, then the final superstructure etc etc. All we do before we leave for office or party is to brush our teeth, and comb our hair and wash our face.. the true natural self! That is what it is... Clean from pathogens and bacteria! That's all we do... we never add on, we remove all dirt!

To add the only men who used to do make up were the egyptians, rather the workers on the pyramids, and they say that once when the supplies of make up material stopped for a week, the pyramid construction also came to a halt, as all the workers demanded make up! That was not a need for looks but of the working conditions, the scorching sun in the desert would burn thier skin without make up... So they had to!

So men out there including me can rejoice, we are born handsome and beautiful!

Friday, July 07, 2006

How to control em?

Discovering that the golden rule of controlling someone was to grab his uttermost guilt feeling, and to play with was a really tough one! But then it is a golden rule, gold is real hard to find!

The first rule in an corporate environment ordane discipline as a religion is to keep all your staff underperforming.

This might be quite the wrong perspective but like newton's greatest law that each action has an equal and opposite reaction, each and every belief has its reinforcing statement. This feeling is because the opposite of underperformance, that is performance breeds defiance.

The same goes to ancient history... when spartacus, a slave in rome, who was a gladiator, felt that he was the best gladiator, and revolted against rome itself, that was because he thought he had the liberty to do so, as he was the best.

Every employee who has over achieved his targets starts feeling the he is too good for his job, and starts looking for a new one. If he has not performed well, the guilt feeling that the company provided him everything and still he couldn't do his job well, keeps him performing, and makes him do well.

This is quite well established system in many companies. They set a target which is literally non-achieveable, and then, provide for some cash sops if you reach around 70% of it. That way you get incentives and are happy (carrot & stick) and then you never happen to achieve your targets, so you are always thinking you are never good enough to leave the company, that feeling once sinks in you know you are secure in your job, as you got incentives, and then you are not such a great man so as to command respect or demand promotions etc, so you are fixed up in your rightful (or so to say) place.

So guys... you are such so worthles, keep on rotting in your organisation... Rusty rest is what you will have till you retire.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

How vast is it after all?

So... Long after my verbal vomit has become really dry, due to my long absence from the scene, I think a delirous diahorrea of deep dogmas might be something that all you guys can digest!

Has anyone ever thought how vast this universe is after all? I do wonder sometime, when I am lying on the roof of my abode and blankly stare into the skies in the night, with all those twinkling stars...

Then I wonder, if earth is just a planet revolving around a single star, and there are atleast 10 or 11 planets ( as
our science improves we will find more planets around the sun. So how many billion kilometers are used up only by our solar system... Now think that our good old sun, and we used to consider as the greatest till recently is just another disturbed guy who is fuming with fusion... end result our sun is just another star out of the billions of stars in our galaxy. (Which we call as the milky way) and it in essence covers billions of kilometers multiplied by the billions of stars and thier own solar systems.

Now for a second, just think that there are millions of galaxys in the universe... So multiply the already billion kilometers multiplied by the billion solar systems multiplied by the million universes. So that is a lot of space!! And really vast!

Now the greatest twist... as per doppler effect we can find out that we are a gradually expanding galaxy. Or that if we were all compressing by coming together the gravitational pull of each other star, galaxy & planet will make it form a big black hole... and a really big one at that! That is that all will collapse to each other, if our galaxy's were coming nearer... So they are moving away from each other... So that means they all have enough space to move away.. with all this area already in trillions of billions now these guys are not packed.. they have ample space to move.....

So it means all the universe and all will look like some hundred small round marbles spread out in huge sahara desert... They have lot of space to move around... So that is how vast it is?

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Entrophy?

So long for my enthusiasm in blogs! So why say so long? Or you should say my blogs are so long? Might be as the same are read too less I suppose! So I will keep it short, and its easier for me too...

Then when I think I worry is it my philospohical drive which keeps people away?
I really dunno... I am seriously thinking of a viable blog, might be on one of my interests... Conspiracy theories, or Defence and weapons etc...

So another blog for you guys will be dedicated soon, something which will interest the uninterested!

And all you guys who long for my unbelievably skewed view of the world which I call philosophy... It will still continue, because if I keep all this to myself.. I will go mad... I will share my share of insanity with this insane world, atleast to keep me sane in an already insane world!

Then what is the point? Then I will be the only one sane... and branded as insane!

So it is all a vicious circle, and the perils of being alive in a world whose basic rule of entropy says that it will in the end lead to chaos, if there is noone to control it! Just hope I am not the pivot which most call equilibrium!

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Instincts or Intellect?

Collective information on a long observed phenomenon leads to intellect, and Instinct is simply your gut feelingl! Have we ever thought what gut feeling means?

It means how your stomach feels when you are in a situation, which is involuntary action, it is not regulated by your brain directly under its consciousness, but it is a subconscious feeling!

So does your gut churn when you are in a tight situation, do you feel your muscles twitch when you are in danger, shouting loudly run, run run...! So does it help... sure it does! Primal fears apart, in most cases they do yield results that you might never have credited them for, like your ability to resist some unforeseen falls, is mostly because your adrenalin has braced your muscles for them!

I am not athiest, but I am a staunch believer in science, so I would rather like to call that these are inborn lines of code written on into our basic disk operating system or in some cases basic input/ output system in our DNA. So it comes in all beings without difference.

So by the way I know something that I share with you, in cases when your intellect is better use them, but in cases that don't really require your intellect, give into your instinct!

If you are unsure about how can instincts be studied, look at systems which have lower system configuration! Like how an electronics engineer starts his course by learning to make a disco light circuit using a 555 chip, and then he progresses on to todays processors and systems and its operating systems. So we also can learn about instincts by looking at smaller computers in the organic world... Ants-the parallel processors, the animals-the computers without a good processor, and in the end to understand our own intellect.

You can understand this.. like a tiger which has a good meal after hunting, will eat it, walk a small distance, mostly none as his prey is found near the water hole, and then he lies down in the shade and rests...

I feel we humans too should also not tax our brains too much as to what is to be done after a good meal... Some say you should not rest, should take a walk and etc etc... but in the end any activity done after lunch reduces bloodflow to your intestines and hence lesser absorption of nutrients, even thinking or doing mental work is not good, as it takes away the intestines share of blood to the brain...

So guys trust your gut feeling and then take a nap after lunch, it only helps, all your stroll excersize and everything else can come after that!

There are many more ways in which your instincts help you... but if your instinct says otherwise, trust me, before you do it think many a time... because our BIOS(instinct) is also a new version, it is also been upgraded, and hence in itself a Collective information on a long observed phenomenon or intelligence!

My gut says now that I need some dinner... So see ya guys!

Monday, January 30, 2006

Treasure yourself?

What I discover or try to is the deepest emotions, what you call as instincts, so it rather does not have anything to do with how you behave in society, or how you might want others to percieve you... Then it goes a level higher! What I am trying to find out is our deepest thoughts and how they originate! I hope it answers my readers on my earlier lectures!

So how come I am treasuring myself? Why should I? When my thoughts don't go above the maslow's hierarchy pyramid's lowest floor... which is instinctive needs! Food, Shelter and Clothing! But when I really think of it, in some of my other writings, I have gone into spirituality and love, desire all on various floors of the pyramid!

So am I being opportunistic in trying to avoid a comment on my earlier post? Not really, the first paragraph is specifically to my last post! So now I discover something, that my thoughts are really wandering ones... not simply the name!

This thought came to me when I was travelling last day, I just looked up at the sky without my glasses (yeah I do wear one... not the big rimmed nerd brand ones, although I sound like one!), I wondered when I couldn't see the stars clearly, five years before when I had perfect eyesight, then I never even thought how precious they were!

Today I miss it... not able to see a charming young female walk on the other side of the street without gallelio's help! More so... now it is only shortsightedness, what if I need them to read? Ohhhhhhhh that will be a real pain! Although I need to wear them all the time, but I will be not have a choice... like now!

So I started wondering... what if I turn completely blind? Who will care for me? What if I am handicapped in someway in one fine day?(Now that can't be called a really fine day), Will the people who think so highly of me (yeah they do... I am not all that bad at work or in love!), will they be there for me?

If I think seriously, might be the ones I love, surely will stay along... but the people at work? For them I will be junk! They will throw me out as easily as a dysfunctional computer or a printer... where a change of catridge will cost as much as a the printer itself, or an upgrade of the chip will yield not much of results!

So now I think... am I insured enough? Yeah now this is not an advertisement for any insurance company? but it is just to realise... do we understand our worth? How will we support our loved ones when we are incapable? What is our fallback plan? I have learned in many negotiation skills classes about a fallback plan... A plan which will give you comfort and strength to negotiate, which means, what if I don't get what I want from this negotiation, what can I fall back on... Although I handle 5-10 negotiations a month for my company... do I have a fallback option for myself?

When I am negotiating my whole life, and life of many others who love me... Do I have a fallback option with which I can be comfortable, if my source of income stops completely one day?

When I think about it... it gets more and more tense... because I realise, I had never understood my real worth, hence I have never insured myself enough! My advise... Ponder! For a minute or two... just treasure yourself!

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

An ant is never an achiever!

A way of thinking, is called a perspective... a view is called a perspective, to see what is in front of you is your thought! Your vision, but that same thing can be your greatest strength and weakness too!

I have heard many a sucess stories of people who have achieved all from nothing... But then I wonder? Is it disproportionately blown up, or are they real achievers? By the size of achievements people have made, by seeing their future is huge... I have to believe that the results are not blown up, nor is the comparison, as from where he started and where he has ended!

Now then what can be the reason? I have always felt, why people like me are non achievers are because I am like an ant! I work in a colony, surrounded and supported by my co workers, and I am happy of my daily share of food, shelter and protection! I will never want to loose all what I have! Although it is debatable as to what I have now, is something that cannot be foregone for what I can achieve!

Then I understand... like all ants I am also a prey of the Middle class syndrome! I have a secure job, a secure life, and I don't want to take risks! So is that the reason that the poorest of the poor get to be richest one day, might be because he has nothing to loose!

Or I am wrong in thinking.. but then it is a vicious circle, might be because I think like this I feel I have a lot to loose and that man on the street has nothing to loose (even a begger I have heard feels territorial, feeling if he looses the area he was begging daily, he might loose his fair share of revenue).

Might be that is why, I like the ant can never be an achiever... because like an ant I can see only 2 dimensions, and a ladder put vertically in the third dimension in front of me, I might never see it as an opportunity to grow, because I know only my two dimensions, and I really don't know what the third is!

Monday, January 23, 2006

Computer games and my addiction?

So, another two days passes on without any visitors to my blog, well now I have turned so shameless that I have advertised it on my emailing group, so that atleast by that someone will peep in!

So lets get to today's topic without further delay, by the way why do I have to keep on discussing and discovering, I really don't know... but then as I said... everyday is a discovery, so I keep my efforts on!

So when I first saw this little thing which could be called a computer game console... I took an instant liking to it! It was the earliest version, an old nintendo, but then not until I had seen the History channel recently, I didn't realise that I was also a part of the whole gaming buffs who had laid their hands on the "tennis game" of nintendo, or rather that way a part of History! I used to spend shamelessly hours in my neighbours place, gaming away to glory!

Then came another better version, which had a game list which counted in thousands... again in another neighbours place, shamelessly gaming away to even greater glory!

It was not until I got one in our house that I started realising shamefully as to how shameless I was... Now that is an irony! But then... Shame is such a thing, that will make you even ashamed about your own shamelessness! Now that is even more irony!

Anyways so that goes the story how I took to gaming... But why was I so hooked? Or why are all of us so hooked? WhenI personally "ponder" I wonder, Is it because I am able to do all what I can't do in my real life? I personally am a fan of the first person shooting or adventure games... I like to kill evil people, I like to fly airplanes, drive trains, driving a F1 car, a GP500 Bike and what not! All things I couldn't do in this life... and somethings that I can never do with any life like Killing red faced, bulb head Aliens, Green puke Mutants, and also riding on top of a dragon, or saving a princess!

Should be because we are all so fixated with fantasising that it reaches levels which can only be called shameful! So... At the end of all this I wonder, should I have named this blog as shame??

So lets hope there will be a time when these games will be full fledged virtual reality, better than today's "playstations" or "XBox's" wherein we might have "Playstadiums" and "XRooms" (by the way these two trademarks are coined by me, hence registered automatically through this blog, and one against it can come and do a sword fight with me while I ride on a dragon... might be the guys who wants to challenge me, will be a Pumpkin headed mutant riding on an ant!),

And hope that all of us guys are blessed with more shameless indulgence!

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Why do I choose my colors?

When someone is upto something, you never know... but when he has done something repelling then he is upto his true colors! When you have achieved something he is said to have come out from it with Flying colors!

When I write a prologue to match a thought in my mind, it usually stinks... like this one above! So let me get to what I want to tell you about! I wanted to talk to you all today about Colors! By the way - "all"?? My readership has dwindled to a low minute figure of, yeah you guessed it right "zero!"

My first blog was read by one, the next zero! Now that is some color, whether flying or drowing that I don't like!

So let us get to the topic which I was "pondering" about! Like in the steven spielberg produced cartoon serial "Pinky and the Brain", where the intelligent mice, the brain who wants to take over the world one day.. asks his accomplice, the mice called Pinky... about his plans to take over the world and asks..."Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?"
Pinky replies "I think so Brain, but . . ." The result is always utterly nonsense anwer to the context given, indicating that Pinky was in no way pondering what Brain was pondering. So my friends...

I think the same is the case with us, I can assure you, none of you are pondering what I am pondering!

I was just pondering after my big lectures on philosopy of life, love, revenge and god and devil...Why in the world do I choose lighter color shirt, and a darker color pants? Or why do all of us? How many times do we wear a cream pants with a dark shirt? Count them on your fingers... and I am sure it will end before your digits end!

By digits I mean your fingers, the number by the way adds upto ten... until and unless you have some mutation! By that I would like to add that there is a digital analysis done for swelling of your prostrate gland... by the way that gland is near your prostrate and the only way you can access is through your prostrate (rear)... So it is not all that hitech, but imagine you are a cow in a vetinary college waiting for the trainee doc's to do digital examination with their long rubber glows... Ooouch! I hope you get the general idea!

So why do we choose these colors? I think or rather from now on I ponder... that it should be because of my being a diurnal animal (Yeah, even I had to try theasarus, to find the opposite of nocturnal!) We are always used to seeing the surroundings like that... the sky and the earth! Always the sky is bright and and the earth dark! Might be that is why when I am going for a party I wear the the opposite, then I am nocturnal! Am I trying a camouflage? or trying to merge in?

My friend who is an expert in blogging says I shouldn't stretch it too long.. yeah not simply called a blog and not a novel!

So guys.. I hope now you have seen my true colors, and I think I have come out of it with flying colors! Or rather I have put everything in Black and white... There is no grey areas! Or rather I have tickled your grey cells... now I am stretching too long! Hope all you guys will be in the Pink of your health!

Friday, January 20, 2006

Devil? An Evil or a Trusted servant of God?

First of all let me reply to the only reader who has been kind enough to read through my Post!

For a start... Let me say, He has got me hooked... Although I am a fresh blogger, now he has really got me hooked! He has kindled the devil in me! The devil seeking fame, name, and also materialistic pleasures (Which might sometime be fulfilled when I become a great writer and start my own site... Where all the other bloggers might drop in to read my revelations on truth, love, life, purpose and all the other words in the dictionary!)

Purpose of life is not a day to day phenomenon! When my purpose today is to earn a living and to provide for my family, the day after it might be to might be join the army and fight for my country! But for today if I think that my purpose is only to fight and die for my country, then what about my family? If it is only to provide for my family, what about my country?

When someone knows his purpose of life.. usually it ends up in death... Sacrifice is the name given for it... Might be because we call it the supreme offering? People die as Jehadi's because they think their purpose of life is to fight the evil and to avenge the death of their loved ones, People die in love, and then it is called that he found his purpose in life! Might be I am wrong?

Like I said... Every day is a discovery? and my purpose of life is surely that... but is it all I do, is it the only purpose? If it was then what is the point to live on... so my life goes on because I am still discovering the purpose of life! Or else I am long gone!

Now that I have given some more thoughts... I think I have stirred the devil in all of you to succeed and think more than I do?

So what is devil or who is he?

There are two paths in life they say... One the good path, which leads you to heaven and god... The other the bad.. which leads you to hell and Devil!

So...Lets start analysing this issue... If I was a worshipper of devil.. Then I would walk the wrong and be punished to hell... and if I am nice man, god fearing, then I will receive hell! Now let us understand who controls hell and heaven.. God is in heaven, and Devil is in hell...

I know god is no politician, as someone who is as strong as him needs no politics to stay in his chair! But devil... The poor devil that he is... needs to do a lot of coaxing and campagning to get people to be with him, or rather follow his path! After all this when someone joins his path, we can call it the "devil's lifestyle", Then the devil himself will punish you for joining his party! How strange?

Is devil a fool? Poor devil that he is... I think whatever he might be, he is not a fool, after all he has managed to co-exist with the supreme power, "God" for so long, the all knowing, all pervasive god... So he is not an idiot anyways.. his IQ should be as good as, or near to the god's!

Another point to be considered before we reach any conclusion... God is remembered by all when the devil creates trouble in the world.. like the terrorists all over the world, even though some of then call themselves the preachers of god, still try and create havoc! Or when some man steals another man's life savings... the poor exploited one thinks of god! So devil is the proverbial "Essential Devil", so that people will remember god in his sorrows...

So after all this, I wonder? Is devil collaborating with god? Or is devil a simple servant of god... Who has been projected as equally powerful as god, but has to punish his own devlish little followers to no ends.. even making them boil in cauldrons... and burning them to ashes again and again?

So after all he is a servant... of his wishful master.. god! And why? Is god politically trying to align us to his path? reminding us of what lies ahead if we don't follow his path? Or is it that they are two sides of coin? "I still wonder... and I hope, what the devil! If only I could find out what god is!"

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Why the name?

Dear all...

The first question you would always wonder when you see this blog is why the name? Why not Edmond Dantes, and why Edmond Dante? That is because, I took to blogging late, and there was someone else who liked Mr. Edmond Dantes, who later on became the count of Monte Cristo, as much as me!

I had to have this name to my blog, or a fair resemblance, as I wanted it to show my wandering thoughts, like Dantes, who was all alone in a jail for half of his life... We are all prisoners in our own lonliness, even when we are in a party, emprisoned by our attitude, our inferiority complex, our superiority complex, our desires, our failures, our achievements, everything in our life emprisons us! So I think I really needed this name to find a way to freedom!

This was one fiction story I would have preferred to be true... A man's true strength is about the will to do something!

And that will is more so negative than positive... His strengths are more when he is under a kind of stress! What kind of stress can it be?

All who say that love is the best mover are in a way true... It moves, but the directions achieved is never coherent!

But when you are moved by revenge, your achievements have purpose... a sense which always allows you to succeed.

I am not someone who supports revenge or vengeance as a philosophy, but the Fiction "The Count of Monte Cristo" is a true tribute to what not can a man achieve by revenge!

At the same time the sense of purpose is completely momentous when you think of it as a means for your revenge... Like in the novel, the protoganist has nothing in his life to live for, once he has achieved his revenge... Only because he has nothing to live on.. or rather nothing to love on...

So people I would only find it by posting this blog as an answer to the purpose of life... It is never for revenge, it is never for love... It is only for the purpose of life... and what is that? I think it takes more than a single blog to answer that... but let me understand with you that it is a mixture of lot of things... like always each and every one of these blogs will only try to interpret them, but never will we find an answer, you can expect it to go on, because if someone says he knows the purpose of his life, he is not fit to live!

Every day is a discovery... every thought a philosophy.. and that is when life is life!

So guys get set to read my small but simple thoughts on life.. most of them will be blabber, most of them without meaning, some might call it philosophy.. but I would prefer to call it a journey of discovery!

And if in the end if I am a bit more better than anyone else reading this, then I will stop writing, because then I will have be out preaching and not sharing!

Love you guys... all you unknown faces who read me are the best thing which happened to my life and my best recognition.. and if you keep on reading I will give you all a chocolate icecream or a chicken piece, as if you are reading this expecting no rewards, then you should be crazy like me!

So it is a recognition to me that even though I am weird writing this stuff, but then there are many others who are as crazy as me to read all the crazyness that I am writing! STOP!!! I know it is going far... now I am loosing my rating! Sorry you are intelligent beings who are trying to find purpose of life and understanding it like me!

Will try to be more interesting next time.. if "more" is a word which is relative in sense, then... then take that it will be exponentially interesting as I know how boring I have been this time!